Chapter 1: The Importance of Self-Respect

Self-respect is crucial in our daily lives, yet many struggle to uphold it.

"In the movie Yes Man, Jim Carrey portrays a character who, after attending a seminar, decides to say yes to everything, fearing that refusing will bring bad luck. This leads him down a path of constantly sacrificing his own plans for others."

Have you ever found yourself in a similar situation? Perhaps you have your own plans but feel compelled to join a friend who asks, "Shall we go out?" To avoid disappointing them, you abandon your plans, telling yourself, "I'll tackle it when I get home." Yet, upon returning, fatigue takes over, and you end up postponing everything until the last minute. This pattern often leaves many tasks unfinished.

Why does this pattern persist? Why is it so hard to refuse others when we know what we want? The answer lies in our self-respect. Studies indicate that a child's psychological foundation is primarily shaped in the first five to six years of life. If during this period, they are frequently compared to others or have decisions made for them, they may develop low self-esteem. Conversely, if children are given total autonomy in decision-making, they risk becoming disrespectful. Therefore, the ideal approach is to foster environments that encourage collaborative decision-making.

Think about someone you deeply respect. How do you prepare for a meeting with them? If you're a soldier, how do you respond when your commander calls? Most likely, you make an effort in your appearance and communication. You approach any tasks assigned with diligence. This respect comes from acknowledging their value. Shouldn’t you extend that same courtesy to yourself? Cultivating self-respect is a powerful antidote to low self-esteem. When you honor yourself, you’ll find that others begin to honor you too.

Malcolm Gladwell once shared an anecdote from his youth. "A customer of my father arrived for a meeting at nine o'clock. He came ten minutes early, and I informed him my father would be there shortly. He waited patiently, but by one minute past nine, he stood up and left, stating, 'Have him reschedule.' My father, upon learning of the incident, promptly apologized and committed to being punctual in the future." This illustrates that if we fail to assert ourselves and say no, others may assume we are always available and will take our time for granted.

I hope you embrace days filled with self-respect, allowing others to respect you in return.

Chapter 2: Learning to Say No

Section 2.1: The Challenge of Saying No

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Subsection 2.1.1: Building Self-Respect