Chapter 1: The Dynamics of Brotherhood

In this ongoing five-part series, we delve into the nature of male friendships—how they develop, what sustains them, and their significance in our lives.

During my college years, I joined a fraternity with little understanding of what it entailed. I had a vague notion of the large Greek life at major universities, but at my small liberal arts college in northern Texas, joining a fraternity felt more akin to becoming part of a social circle. However, once the excitement of Bid Night wore off, I realized that being part of this group would require effort and commitment.

On the night of our first rally, we were advised to “dress for the elements.” At around 8 PM, the ten new pledges gathered in Jeff’s room to prepare. I had developed a friendly rapport with Jeff during Freshman Orientation and in shared classes, as well as being neighbors in the same dormitory.

Jeff was the tallest in our pledge class, with long, shaggy hair during our freshman year. Like the rest of us, he enjoyed partying, but just before we signed our bid cards, he opted for a clean, military-style haircut. He was clearly getting ready for what lay ahead.

On that chilly February night, appropriately dressed for the weather, the ten of us stood in Jeff’s dorm room, filled with a mix of nervousness and excitement. We exchanged names, hometowns, and family details, armed with minimal guidance other than the importance of getting to know one another.

Just before we headed out, Jeff drew our attention to an open Bible on his desk. He read a passage with an intensity reminiscent of Samuel L. Jackson in Pulp Fiction, igniting a sense of fear, anger, and undeniable determination within us all. Whatever challenges awaited that night, we felt ready to face them together.

Jeff has always been the steady presence in my life—the dependable one, the logical thinker, the moral compass. His sincerity and remarkable ability to solve problems efficiently continue to inspire me.

During a recent trip to Mexico, Jeff flew down to Oaxaca City to meet me. We spent a couple of nights enjoying exceptional mezcal and indulging in some of Mexico's finest cuisine. On our last day, we booked a tour package to visit popular sites outside the city, only to realize that we were part of a large bus tour with little flexibility, risking our dinner reservation later that evening.

Jeff quickly took charge. He reached out via WhatsApp to our AirBnB host, whose relative was a taxi driver. Within moments, he had arranged for Alfonso, the driver, to pick us up in the textile town of Teotitlán, take us to Hierve el Agua, and return us to the city later that afternoon. Jeff calculated that this would save us both time and money compared to the tour package.

And indeed, it did. We had our own driver and ample time to reconnect. We returned to the city with enough time for a leisurely siesta before dining that evening at one of Oaxaca City's top restaurants, a reservation Jeff had made a week in advance.

On the family side, Jeff exemplifies the importance of human connection and real experiences to his children. He encourages his son to appreciate relationships and urges his daughter to engage in creative activities rather than screen time. His wife shares his drive and ambition, and he actively supports her in starting her own business, just as he has successfully done.

He often poses this thought-provoking question to himself and others: “If you could do anything you desired, what would it be?”

Having friends like Jeff is not just a luxury; it's essential. They remind us of how to live our lives to the fullest, motivating us to exceed our limits and strive for the extraordinary whenever possible.

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The story was previously published on The Good Men Project.

About Taylor García

Taylor García is the author of the short story collection FUNCTIONAL FAMILIES from Unsolicited Press and the novel SLIP SOUL from TouchPoint Press. His stories and essays have appeared in various journals and magazines, and he holds an MFA in Writing from Pacific University Oregon. He resides in Southern California with his family. Connect with him at www.BTaylorGarcia.com or on Twitter and Instagram @BTaylorGarcia.