Chapter 1: Understanding the Devil Within

The concept of the devil can be interpreted as anything that obstructs your path towards fulfilling your true purpose or dharma—the vocation or service that brings you genuine satisfaction. This "devil" often manifests not as an external entity, but rather as negative thoughts or rigid beliefs within ourselves that hinder our progress.

In 1985, I took on a Personal Assistant position with a domineering supervisor who reluctantly allowed me to start at 9:00 AM instead of the 8:00 AM he originally demanded. However, within weeks, he insisted I shift my hours to 8:00 AM, making it clear that my job depended on complying with his wishes. I quickly realized that this was part of his plan all along.

Living in Arizona, a “Right to Work” state—a term that cynically implies the right to be dismissed at will—left me unprepared for the lack of protections afforded to employees. Coming from the East Coast, where worker rights are better upheld, I felt vulnerable in this new environment.

During my four years with him, I often found myself working Saturdays without additional pay. On Administrative Professionals Day, instead of cash, I received a floral arrangement, much like my female colleagues. We all would have preferred a monetary reward, which we certainly earned.

This experience was my personal deal with the devil—not my boss, who was merely a representative of a certain mindset, but my own fear. I feared that I wouldn’t find a better situation and settled for this disrespectful treatment.

I had identified my boss as a control freak during the job interview, yet I convinced myself that I could handle the situation. This decision led me to a cycle of disrespect, as the balance of power lay entirely in his hands.

Today, I understand that no paycheck is worth sacrificing my self-respect. While financial stability is crucial, it should never come at the cost of personal dignity. I have no intention of allowing myself to be treated like an expendable resource.

In retrospect, I wish I had rejected that job offer and sought something more fulfilling. Over the years, my boss would give minor perks while violating major agreements, as if none of us were perceptive enough to notice the imbalance.

Each of us had entered into our own agreements with our inner devils, convincing ourselves that we were incapable of achieving more.

If that isn't a battle with the devil, I’m not sure what is.

Chapter 2: The Impact of Fear on Our Aspirations

A friend of mine, an exceptionally talented actor, was convinced from childhood that he was meant for the stage. However, the harsh realities of the industry took their toll on him. Despite his remarkable talent, he repeatedly lost lead roles on Broadway to others, leading to his eventual exit from the profession.

Who can blame him for quitting? I left the business myself years prior. Yet, our paths diverged. I found fulfillment in teaching yoga and officiating weddings, realizing that my dharma could be expressed in various ways. Unfortunately, he never found satisfaction in other careers and defines happiness merely as the absence of suffering.

This notion is akin to saying the relief a cancer patient feels from pain medication is equivalent to living a healthy life—it's simply not true.

He continues to grapple with the feeling that he failed to achieve his true purpose, which exemplifies a struggle against one’s own devil.

Harriet Beecher Stowe wisely stated, “When you get into a tight place and everything goes against you till it seems you could not hold on a minute longer, never give up then; for that is just the place and time that the tide will turn.”

In essence, she advises against succumbing to that inner voice; resist making deals with the devil inside your head. If you genuinely believe you are meant for something greater, persist in pursuing it. You never know when a breakthrough might occur.

Yes, the current economic landscape is challenging. Countless qualified individuals find themselves unemployed. We are all aware of the obstacles that surround us. However, the internal devil often obscures the possibility that favorable circumstances could also be aligning for us.

Eventually, the tide must turn. It may require remarkable patience to achieve remarkable rewards.